Week of 4/3/2017: Cramer's Netflix Comedy Special (Review)

Discussion in 'Off topic - humor, oddities, videos, politics' started by zyzzyva57, Apr 7, 2017.

  1. zyzzyva57

    zyzzyva57 Active Member

    This week, we “Mad Money” drooling fans learned of the next life for Cramer when he retires. Jimmy Cramer, our Stock Guru, has a second life as I discovered on Netflix as a comic named "Louis C.K." I was happily surprised. When I saw Cramer come out as a comic, I thought: lame Bob Hope type of humor for corporations titans.
    I was so wrong!
    As the Louis C.K. character, Cramer did come out attired for boardrooms and motivation extravaganzas of look at-me, me, me. He then started his routine, and it was raw and tha hell with political correctness. Nothing sacred and dear was not attacked with the gusto I only observed in the early days of “Mad Money” when he threw desk chairs and verbally attacked the scummier of the Chief Operating Lizards of Wall Street for their shenanigans.
    If you dare, check out this Netflix comedy special “Louis C.K., 2017,” but be forewarned, Cramer is Cramer, but the old (and missed) Cramer-in-your-face, as we old “Mad Money” watchers fondly recalled. CNBC would do well to bring the old Cramer back to “Mad Money.” “Mad Money” with the host Cramer’s alto ego “Louis C.K.” would attract younger viewers, as well as us old war horses of “Mad Money” when it was aptly “WTF Money.”
    WE NEED THE OLD CRAMER BACK!
    WE NEED HIS "WALL OF SHAME"! NOT "WALL OF FAME" FOR THESE WALL STREET LIZARDS!!!!!

    The maker of Porta Potty unveiled Porta Comfy so any anti-Trumpster may have a safe space anywhere s/he travels, lives, or eats. “Never has luggable been so loveable with this cute Teddy Bear like structure the user can climb right into anywhere at anytime,” Cramer explained…
    Wu Wei Talent founder told Cramer now his company handles for Steve Jobs’ daughter the “Steve Jobs' Scuffy Look” of tattered (tailored) jeans and (tailored) black turtle necks, as well as a fake scrappy unshaved look for the female clients, for the next fast Silicon Valley fast talking “Eddie”…
    The Wu Wei founder confessed his company now has ready a full line of cheesy—though expensive—line of pure crap ready for the next Visit by the Black Swan when North Korea, or someone, lets loose its nuclear arsenal.
    Cramer assured us Wall Street is ready for the next big Black Swan event now called by Wall Street think tanks “Ka-Ching!”


    Thurs, Cramer had to contend with the alleged sighting of FED Chairman Janet Yellen caught smiling sending the stock market into a tailspin. Cramer settled viewers calming us she is a robot and the smile has been confirmed as being a glitch caused by a butterfly flying in Hawaii that a FED computer programmer swallowed while on a vacation.
    Later, Cramer broke down and had to be carried off the “Mad Money” set as he became hopeless confused with his segment on the new HP split-up—Cramer is (apparently) super impressed with the new line of HP printers with its tagline, “the future was yesterday—now!” Cramer said HP has one upped the printing industry this past week with its new line of 4D printing: “Companies can print tomorrow in the past tense now!"…
    Amazon Super Prime members, regardless their location, now can order groceries, have them picked up, then eaten on the spot without the member leaving the house, said innovator Mr. Ted Kaczynski of Fremont County, Colorado, as he, too, now enjoys scrumptious meals as he contemplates the next Big Thing when he is released from America’s top prison in five thousand years…

    ALL WALL STREET CEO’S ARE NOT, NOT! CRETIN LIZARDS!!!!!
    Case in point: Beauty Industry Exec Keeps Photo Of Crying 15-Year-Old Girl On Desk To Remind Himself Why He Does This,…
    President Trump’s new Internet Security

    The “Snake, the Cat” tech blog says the new Steve Job’s 10th Anniversary iPhone 10
    will offer a feature allowing the user to change his body frequencies enough to walk through walls, or be “phone” to another location (also having this phone version to receive him). “The fad of the future will become known as ‘quarking’ around,” Snake wrote ...
    A fight is brewing over the need for standards of what is reality 1-0-1: Famed CERN labs has agreed to put on hold its next trillion-dollar search for a faster brief particle than less than a trillionth of a trillionth of a second to make standards for what is reality now! The research will be led by whom believe will be the next Albert Einstein / Steven Hawking nexus, the dashing, impish wunderkind cosmetologist Missy Prissy Maquel Chabon of the famed Estée Lauder Labs… (Missy Prissy is alleged to have allowed Schrödinger's cat to starve to death waiting on scientists to determine if the cat was alive or dead!)

    To counter “Shrinkage” (i.e., shop lifting mainly). Walmart has upped its internal security guards….
    Law enforcement officers in Busted Butt, Iowa, are not amused to learn that often their free coffee from local burger joint Clog contained WD-40. “Its new robotic fast food worker Flippy was caught pissing WD-40 into our FREE coffee and on our FREE donuts,” Busted Butt Police Department’s famed S. “Lard Ass” Holmes told the newspaper Busted Butt, Iowa, Telegraph

    Remember! You have a true friend waiting at your local animal shelter...
     
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